Don't Waste Time

So far, the most rewarding aspect of my career has been the constant deconstruction/reconstruction of self and my thought process. I love the idea of revisiting my circuitry to get a map on where I stand at that moment. The perpetual reappraisal of techniques, ideas, styles, approaches and even personal aesthetic is an amazing exercise. While still in college, I had a professor tell me that if I loved a particular piece too much to change it, then I had lost the opportunity to grow. This has been a hard lesson learned over the years, but in the attempt to do so I have become a more effective creative professional and, in a larger sense, a better person. My creative abilities are rooted in my life en masse, so self-assessment is a life skill as well as a career skill.

In the spirit of self-assessing, the main thing I would have done differently is that I would have followed my own voice earlier and more often. Near the end of my schooling I fell into the common trap of doing what I thought was going to get me a job—acting the part rather than investing in myself and listening to my instincts. I know that there are certain norms that come with any career path but I was very much a “sheep,” in that I went along with the “in crowd” of the art and design set in the hopes that what I was doing would gain me peer acceptance. This added many years more than necessary and lots of uncomfortable fits in the search for what was right for my career and, ultimately, my life.

The main thing I would have done differently is that I would have followed my own voice earlier and more often.

The about-face came when I had done everything “right” by the standards of the design clique but didn't like what I saw in my work or in the mirror. It came to the point where the work was good but stale because it didn't have any of my own instincts in it. Sadly, I couldn't trust myself with my own ideas. That's a gut-wrenching realization. Now, that's not to say that I was a Rebel Without a Clue. No. I simply learned to study, communicate and operate with the knowledge of what good design is, but stay present in the work and listen to my own voice and trust myself and my instincts.

As for regrets, I have a couple. I would like to have spent more time in another region of the country. I crave constant stimulation, indulgence and communication and that's not often found in my area. It's difficult because where I live can be rather “vanilla” and personally I am not. My personal style affects my creative style, so it can be hard at times. The other regret I have is tied to the first. In the earlier years of my career path, I had a complete lack of involvement with or exposure to the wider world of professional creativity. The job market in my area was corporate and dominated by larger ad agencies, reducing many designers to nothing more than template fillers. So, a large amount of my time and efforts weren't career oriented, even though I made sure they were still very creative in order to fill that void in my career and personal life. Those years did afford me some very unique ways of being inventive and working in different mediums that to this day continue to shape my approach and style. By not always having that creative work directly associated with my career, I do believe I lost valuable time in the actual business of design.